That kind of a friend

This post is dedicated. To that kind of a friend.

At 25, I never thought I’d be writing one about my best friend. Because I’ve made so many over the last couple of  years and they all mean so much and also because it just seems a tad silly to go gushing about your best friend like you did in school. I almost feel like a five year old coming home and telling mommy all about how my best friend got the most amazing eraser shaped like an ice cream cone to school!

But gushing I am. Because she deserves gushing. Because something big is happening. Because over the last seven years that I’ve known her, she has gushed every time I’ve had news. Doesn’t matter how big or small my news is. It could just quite simply be that I fit into a dress which was two sizes smaller a few months ago (although that has never happened to me) or it could be as big as me getting a boyfriend! She never fails to gush and be excited and soooooper happy (as she puts it) about anything and everything that happens in my life.

But she isn’t all gush. She’s also the warm I-will-give-you-a-bear-hug so big that you will stop crying and I-will-listen-to-you-whine about inconsequential stuff all night long without complaining.

And its not just with me. I know at least ten other people that she does all of this with. Because she is that kind of a friend.

Her name is Siddhi and most of you who follow my blog would know her because she is bloody important to me. If you are reading this and you know her, I’d love to hear what else you love about her, apart from the fact that she is absofuckinglutely awesome!!

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26 and Single?

That combination rattled a close friend of mine enough to start an email thread titled “I don’t have a subject line for this…”

The email actually went like this-

25 and single… acceptable .. actually quite cool!

butttt… 26 and single… ummmmmmm ????????

How is it that a simple number can get us usually-sensible-women to lose our minds in a jiffy? If you think about it, it’s just a number right? You jump another year, blow candles on another birthday cake. But it’s not that simple, is it?

You also start to think about your age every time you are asked for your DOB on a feedback form at a restaurant, or at the doctor’s or when you see your friend getting married on Facebook or even better, having a baby on Facebook!

Are we so conditioned to society that our brains switch off as soon as we reach the 26 mark? How can we suddenly disregard everything that we’ve earned in the last 25 years – respect, love, money, career, friends, experience to feel that the only thing that matters anymore is that we do not have a husband on our arm?!

And what do we need him for really? Companionship – There are friends galore for that! Money – You are probably earning truckloads already! Boredom – Ever heard of Bungee Jumping? Sex – I could give you that one, but there are ways to work around that as well.

To me, the simple answer is simple – Love. Marriage is a celebration of love. Or have we forgotten that, in this race to tie the knot, do the deed, get hitched before we turn that dreaded number of 26?

Why are we so afraid to accept that we haven’t found love yet? That we deserve love – a love that will keep us happy and smiling for the rest of our lives? A love that will make us feel beautiful and sexy and exciting even when we are grey and wrinkly and wearing adult diapers? And in the meanwhile, why have we stopped celebrating our freedom, and the fact that we are sexier, lovelier, more sinful, exciting, experienced in the ways of the world?

Always remember – good things come to those who wait, because we only deserve the best.

Butterflies in the stomach

Love is a matter of the heart but there is always a point in our lives when we look for a logical explanation to this feeling. Because innocence and the age of 16 is far behind us where we could trust everything that came our way, where love seemed easy, and inevitable, and forever and ever was not just a fairy tale, butterflies in the stomach was a tell-tale sign that brought with it a smile and a leap in our step.

And then there is the skepticism that comes with age, where doubt seeps through everything, decisions seem life changing and are; and you wish you were 16 again.

Because at 16, the world was at your feet. All you had to think about was your next party, or that next date, or the cute guy next door and how you will get him to notice you, and now at 25 you wonder…

You wonder if that Prince Charming even exists, and when he comes along, you wonder more. You wonder if he is the one. If what he has to offer is enough, or if you want more and what that more is. So how sure is too sure? How do you know what “it” is? Are those butterflies in the stomach enough or are we looking for more?

We are spoilt for choices today. We find interesting people in our lives at every bend, and they find us. And they will always be there, but do we ever stop to think, in this flurry of conversation and people who come and go, about what is it that really makes us tick?

Maybe we should listen to the butterflies more.